originally posted at www.vulnerablog.com on March 24th 2013
I Don’t Want Your Medicine
I don’t want your medicine.
I want to feel
Where I am
Even though its wretched.
I don’t want your medicine.
To be squeezed
Into numbness
With giving up across my face.
I don’t want your medicine.
To comply
With the system
To run the damn rat race.
I don’t want your medicine.
You’re so awkward
Around me
Take some pills for that.
I don’t want your medicine.
On your graph
I’m not ‘normal’
Fuck normal.
I don’t want your medicine
To close off
Neural pathways
The only pathways out.
I don’t want your medicine.
For my struggle
To be chemical.
I’m fighting for my soul here.
I don’t want your medicine.
I’m disfunctional
To you
But I live my own truth.
I don’t want your medicine
Shutting down my life
Distorting my tears
Making me odd??
I don’t want your medicine.
I want
Acceptance
Reassurance
Kindness
Support
I want the ridiculous box
We’re crammed in, to abort.
I don’t want your medicine.
I want coaxing out
Not snuffing out.
I don’t want your medicine
I want to be welcomed
As I am
A sensitive spectrum
Of all that is.
alexa jael allen © 2013